Everyone Dies

Day 6.5 - Shenanigans


After instructing Annalae to go back to the inn, Blaze super-sneaks his way back to the enchantress’ shop to pick up his new Ghillie suit. He then proceeds to the inn to meet up with everyone, and discovers Caratticus watching over a sleeping and slightly pummeled Voltage. Caratticus has seen no sign of Annalae since earlier that day. Oh dear.

Kho Na’an is walking back to the inn when he is struck with a great pain in his foot and ankle. Poison! :o He recalls the rat bite from earlier, and glances over the swelling purple mark before booking it up to the inn to get the help of Caratticus. Limping at that point, the half-orc shows his companions the purple marks, which fade from to small teeth marks up his leg. Caratticus decides to poke it.

Kho Na’an is displeased with the cleric’s analytical methods, which produce a light yellow pus and thoroughly gross out the half-elf. He asks him if he can cure the disease; Caratticus says no. Kho Na’an is further displeased.

The barbarian and his cleric friend make their way downstairs and decide to speak to the innkeeper. He is no longer cleaning his customary glass, but instead moving his washcloth in a repetitive circle as he stares off into the distance. “Orcs…” Caratticus and Kho Na’an greet him and ask if he knows of any healers around town that could help the larger fellow in his predicament. Innkeep Denien Book tells them of an old man who may or may not be alive – MadHealz324. Kho Na’an immediately goes to seek out this holy man on the southeast side of town, while Caratticus chats up the innkeep and Blaze leaves the inn to perform even more sneaks.

Caratticus makes a deal to keep the room for another five days, then proceeds into the residential areas on the innkeeper’s information of “southeast,” and knocks on doors.

Kho Na’an limps to Matt’s house; upon reaching it, he is barely able to speak, but requests of a chatty Matt the location of MadHealz. The builder points the barbarian to the house on the left at the end of the row, a shotty and nearly torn-asunder home. He knocks; “WE DON’T WANT ANY.” After some coaxing, however, a short old man with a surprisingly well-kept white beard opens the door. Kho Na’an explains his situation, shows the healer his wound, and begs for assistance. MadHealz obliges, inviting him inside.

Caratticus knocks on the door of the second to last home; he is greeted by Charmant, a fluttery sort of person who tells the cleric that MadHealz is just next door, and then invites him to tea. Caratticus is to later forget about the tea (Caratticus.), but still he proceeds to the home of the old healer.

Caratticus knocks on the door, and overhears Kho Na’an state that the stranger must not be trusted. Despite the half-orc’s pleading, MadHealz is sick o’ dat shit, and determines to allow the human cleric inside. Kho Na’an then slips into madness for a bit, referring to Caratticus (who is not at all blue) as “the blue man” and requesting his (orc? human? half-orc?) mother. The half-orc resists the cleric’s subtle attempt to control him; he later gives Caratticus the burliest, Kho Na’aniest, suffocating hug of which he is capable, while MadHealz324 stealthily applies an ointment and whispers a small prayer over the wound. Kho Na’an soon passes out, only to wake five minutes later without a clue of what previously transpired. He runs merrily off to the blacksmith, while Caratticus purchases some of the ointment that Dr. MadHealz324 (as he is formally known) has mixed for the rat poison. That being done, the cleric takes a leisurely walk back to the inn.

Kho Na’an goes to the smithy to meet Smithy, the town blacksmith. In a single conversation, he completely discredits Xenlin and also takes his jerb. He is heard by Blaze, who has finally managed to climb up something.

Blaze first performs the super sneaks about the fountain. Neither hearing nor seeing anything of interest, he concludes that rather than talk to the townspeople like a good little D&Der, he must perform more super sneaks around the rest of town. He begins by carefully spying on the alley of the Rat; he sees one guard at the front, and- following some failed climbing attempts- one guard at the back, as well as two likely criminals conversing near the wagon-cart-thing. One asks how long they need to keep this chick; the other says that the Rat is going to send something to “that weird guy from earlier who screwed with the Seagull.” The first individual asks who the hell the Seagull is; the second claims that he thought it was a good name, since he’s so into birds, and it was catchy enough and don’t judge his name choices ( ;P ). Blaze has an “oh shit” moment, and immediately runs back to Kho Na’an at the blacksmith to explain the situation. He is freaked, and decides that they must have an all-out war with the Rat and his gang. Kho Na’an expertly hypes the blacksmith to fight this blight on his town, and the man gives them two very pretty swords which he forged with his son (tears). With these blessings, in the possession of Blaze who cannot yet use two swords, the two go to find Caratticus, just to see him emerging at that very moment from the alley near the inn.

Blaze briefs Caratticus- roughly speaking- on the situation. Kho Na’an and Blaze are now ready to throw down, but the lawful neutralness in Caratticus requires him to go to Eliade at the Town Hall with this information. Unable to reach an agreement, the barbarian and the ranger run off to save the day, and Caratticus rushes away to bring the LAW.

Blaze and Kho Na’an decide to create a distraction; while Blaze sneaks around the back end of the alley, Kho Na’an must distract the guards enough to draw them away from the wagon-cart-thing. Kho Na’an decides to be a property developer, and begins offering the guards life-changing offers. However, the half-orc appears to suddenly be shit at bluffing, and only serves to terribly irritate one or two guards. Blaze decides he must make his move; he stumbles in his step and fails to properly bonk the rear guard on the head. The criminal turns around- GUYS…” Blaze panicks and attempts to hit with the butt of his sword; criminal guy grabs his wrist and growls. Blaze slashes his wrist, causing him to cry out and release his grasp; criminal guy is pissed. All of the guards are now focused on the attacker, and Kho Na’an decides to do a bit of role reversal!

Caratticus enters the Town Hall to find Eliade reading at her desk; her two men are situated at opposite ends of the room, as usual. The cleric explains the situation; Eliade, as it turns out, is not a fan of the Rat, and instructs the soldiers to find men to cover guard duty so they can join her in the raid. Caratticus mentions that some of his companions were afraid the Rat may have bought out some of her men; Eliade explains that it used to be a problem, but she has since cut down her forces and gained complete trust in the Hope militia. That being said, and the guards having readied themselves, the four lawful individuals proceed to the Rat’s wagon.

While Blaze attempts to outrun his foes, Kho Na’an charges into the wagon-cart-thing; in it, he finds Annalae, hands and feet bound, and ANOTHER CRIMINAL WOAH TWIST. The half-orc acts fast- he pulls out his flint and tinder, and proclaims that if the man so much as touches his weapon, the half-orc will burn the whole thing down. The criminal is sufficiently freaked- he attempts to intimidate the burly man, but fails miserably and is forced to give up the captive. The half-orc, however, is not quite satisfied with this, and rages; he picks up the criminal and casually chucks him through the wall of the wagon-cart-thing. Without another word, Kho Na’an picks up the druid and runs away, holding her above his head as he is chased by three of the five total guardsmen. Just as he is running away, he sees Caratticus approach with Eliade and her guardsmen. LAWFUL STUPID,” he shouts as he makes for the Banshee Wastes. The three remaining fighters counter the three pursuing criminals, and Caratticus runs after his half-orc friend.

Blaze runs along the backs of Hope’s surviving shops, attempting to widen the gap between him and his assailants. Spying the open end of the blacksmith’s shop, the ranger performs yet more super sneaks, leading the two criminals merely by voice through the Smithy until they can encounter Smithy. That they do- the criminals approach, Blaze drops the swords at his feet, and the blacksmith is so fucking ready man. Then— “Son?”

The ranger is still sneaking like a motherfucker, but determines he must see this shit. The son of which the blacksmith speaks is the uninjured criminal- each is very curious as to what the other one is doing there, until the estranged child decides to run dramatically off into the night. The blacksmith is shaken up after this ordeal, but is not yet finished being so fucking ready man. The Blaze-injured criminal readies; charges; and gets bonked on the head by the hilt of Smithy’s sword. With one of his two chasers having absconded and the other quite unconscious at that, Blaze decides it’s time to go to the Banshee Wastes and ready for their meeting with Wanda.


80 exp base
+6 to Caratticus for his expert medical analysis
+4 to Kho Na’an for always being super nice to Matt
+1 to Caratticus for being nice to Charmant, but not coming back for tea
+2 to Kho Na’an for warning MadHealz324 of the dangers of Caratticus
+4 to Kho Na’an and Caratticus for the mind controls
+10 to Kho Na’an and Caratticus for participating in Kho Na’an’s episode
+4 to Kho Na’an for taking Xenlin’s jerb
+8 to Xenlin for losing his jerb
+12 to Blaze for performing super sneaks and never talking to anyone ever
+3 to Blaze for wanting to be a squirrel
+10 to Kho Na’an for hyping the blacksmith
+18 to Caratticus for being the lawful neutral voice of reason
+18 to Blaze for becoming the distraction
+18 to Kho Na’an for being the hero
+5 to Blaze for reuniting father and son (and also having no parents)

Blaze – 118 exp
Caratticus – 119 exp
Kho Na’an – 132 exp
Voltage – 80 exp
Xenlin – 88 exp

Day 6.5 - Shenanigans

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